9 Tips for Sexier Safe Sex
1. Use Toys! Use Condoms!
If you’re using toys in play, it might be a good idea to use a condom on them, even if you’re using toy cleaner before and after (hint: you should be). Be sure to change the condom every time it’s going to come into contact with a different person’s genitals or fluids.
2. Don’t Use Porous Toys without a Condom
While metal, glass and silicone toys are nonporous and can be cleaned completely, most other toys are made from porous materials and cannot ever be fully cleaned. If you’re using jelly, acrylic, cyberskin, leather, or other hybrid material toys, ALWAYS use a condom on them, as they may harbor bacteria even after a proper cleaning. If the toy isn’t phthalate-free, use condoms even in solo play.
3. Get the Right Size
Half the battle with condoms (specifically for men) is getting the right fit. Common issues range from being too tight, with numbness and low sensation, to too loose, with the risk of falling off mid-coitous. Try buying a few sample packs from your favorite brands to test out what size fits your member best!
4. Try Different Condoms
Beyond the factor of size, condoms come in an array of flavors, textures, and coatings. Preferences vary, so there’s no way to recommend what will be “best” for you and your partner, but ribbed and nubbed textures can provide enticing sensations that may enhance sex. Additionally, lubricants and tingly coatings can increase sensitivity, making up for what’s lost by the latex. But hey, who says condoms have to be latex, anyways? Latex-free condoms made out of materials like polyurethane aren’t just for those with allergies; they’re actually often regarded as thinner, less intrusive latex alternatives. Flavored condoms are great for oral, and dental dams and sheet condoms come in yummy flavors, too…so there’s no reason not to use them.
5. Keep Condoms Nearby
Nothing kills the mood like realizing you don’t have a condom on hand. If you have to run to the store, or even the other room, there’s no promise that all parties will still be interested when you return. To counter this issue, stock up on your favorite condoms and stash them in places you know you might need them, such as your bedside table, that box on your coffee table in the living room, or even the glovebox in your car.
6. Get a Little Help
This is especially helpful for male condoms, which often feel like a chore for men to put on. Instead, turn that moment into a sexy hand-job…but try to get it rolled on quickly, because some men might go soft if you don’t!
7. Lube Up, Inside and Out
Put a few drops of water-based lube inside the condom before rolling it on— it can be a game changer for him! This principle also applies to dental dams and female condoms, make sure you lube up underneath them for her before you put it on…it’ll increase the sensations. Always be sure to use water-based lube for this, NEVER silicone or oil (think coconut oil, Vaseline), which degrade the condom and reduce its effectiveness.
8. Put a Ring on It
At the base of a male condom (or even under the balls), a cock ring can be used to help keep the erection hard, which is great for the 28% of men who suffer from CAEP (Condom-Associated Erection Problems). Some cock rings also vibrate, or have specific stimulators on them, to pleasure the clitoris and other sensitive areas.
9. Know the Right Moves
Make a “V” shape with your fingers and fit it around the base of his penis while he’s penetrating you—this works best in missionary position, or variations of it. The applied pressure will help stimulate him where the band of the condom sits, a place that often becomes numb for men during sex. Another way to provide this kind of stimulation is to squeeze your legs together during missionary or doggy-style. For the same reasons, the added pressure will help him feel good even with the condom in place. If he still complains about reduced sensations, you have another option. Tightening creams like China Shrink Cream use muscle tightening agents to tighten your vagina for up to 24 hours. They work surprisingly well, and provide a sexy incentive for him to wear a condom. Men can try erection extender creams and lubes, but often they include numbing agents that might worsen the problem. If you know that would be a problem, instead try tingling or heightened sensation lubes.